Why Losing Yourself is the Key to Finding Yourself
The Paradox of Self
Ever tried to lose your keys by looking for them harder?
No? Then why do we think we can find our true selves by clinging tighter to the one we’ve got? Welcome to the paradox of self—where losing it is the only way to find it, and finding it is the only way to lose it. But don’t worry, the only thing you stand to lose is everything you never really had. Confused? Perfect…
…that’s a great place to start.
The Ego is the Illusion that Won’t Let Go
The ego is like that annoying friend who keeps calling even after you’ve blocked their number.
You can try to lose it, but it’s not going anywhere because it doesn’t really exist. The ego is the self’s cheap knockoff—a poorly made replica that insists on being the real deal.
It’s a convincing illusion, though. So convincing that most of us spend our lives pampering it, protecting it, and defending it like it’s the last cookie in the jar. But here’s the catch: the ego can’t be lost because it was never found. It’s like trying to lose a shadow in a dark room. You can’t get rid of what isn’t there. The process of spiritual awakening is the realization that you’re not who you think you are—literally. The “self” you’ve been trying to improve, protect, and make happy is a phantom. The moment you see through this, the ego dissolves, revealing what was always there: the true self, which is no self.
Think of the ego as a magician’s trick. Once you know how the illusion works, it loses its power over you. You don’t have to fight the ego or wrestle it into submission. Just stop believing in the trick…
…and the magic show is over.
Finding Yourself in the Lost and Found
So, what happens after the ego’s curtain falls?
Do you vanish into the void? Not quite. Losing the ego doesn’t mean losing yourself; it means finding what’s real beyond the self.
It’s like finding out that the dragon you’ve been fighting is just a shadow and that the real you was the one casting it all along. But this isn’t about trading one self for another. It’s about seeing that what you are is beyond all concepts of self. It’s like trying to find the ocean in a drop of water—you won’t find it because it’s the wrong place to look. The true self isn’t something you can grasp or understand. It’s the thing doing the grasping, the understanding. You are the awareness in which all selves appear and disappear.
Enlightenment isn’t about becoming something new; it’s about realizing that you were never the thing you thought you were. The search for the self is like trying to see your own eyes. The harder you look, the more elusive they become, until you finally realize…
…that the one doing the looking is what you were seeking all along.
The Joke’s on You, and It’s Hilarious
Here’s the punchline: the self you’ve been searching for was never lost.
The whole cosmic joke is that you were never the self you thought you were, and the enlightenment you’ve been chasing is just the moment you finally get the joke. So, stop trying to lose yourself. You’re not lost. Stop trying to find yourself. You’re not missing. The self is a paradox that can’t be solved, only laughed at.
And when you finally see the absurdity of it all, that’s when you realize that the real you has been here all along, quietly chuckling at the cosmic joke…
…now, isn’t that funny?