Hey There, Enlightenment Tourist: Are You Bungee Jumping Through Cosmic Consciousness?
A Spiritual Schizophrenic, That's You
Oh, you had a glimpse of Nirvana during morning meditation, and by afternoon you're cursing the barista for messing up your latte?
Welcome to the rollercoaster of pseudo-enlightenment. Stick around, this will be fun. Listen, if you’re toggling between Buddha and Average Joe like some cosmic Jekyll and Hyde, you've got questions. Big ones.
Let's untangle that cosmic knot of yours, shall we?
Main Attraction #1: The Seesaw of Cosmic Drunkenness
Everyone loves to get high—spiritually, I mean.
You feel that surge of divine wisdom, that "Aha!" moment. Like that time Newton got conked by the apple. But then gravity happens. Enlightenment's not a state you hop in and out of like a tepid jacuzzi. If you’re teetering, you’re not there yet.
Don't fool yourself.
Good ol' Leonard Cohen
He left the Zen monastery to chase women and make music. Later, he said the monastery was "real-world" and everything else was a game.
Figure that one out.
Main Attraction #2: The Enlightenment Mirage
You think enlightenment's a destination, like Disneyland for the soul.
Newsflash: There's no arrival gate. Stop waiting for the ticker tape parade. You’re treating enlightenment like a trophy wife—something to show off but never truly understand.
The Emperor's New Clothes
Remember that tale? Everyone pretends until a kid calls out the naked truth. Don't be the emperor.
Strut around naked if you must, but be aware you're naked.
Main Attraction #3: The Post-Awakening Coma
You had your kundalini rush, your non-dualistic jolt, and then what?
Sat down for Netflix? If enlightenment were that easy, we'd all be bloody sages by now. After the bang, comes the whimper.
Case in point: Siddhartha Gautama
Big Sid didn’t stop at the Bodhi Tree. He walked and talked for years. You think he tripped in and out of enlightenment?
No, he became the trip.
Grand Finale: Get Off The See-Saw, Pal
Here’s the kicker. Stop tallying your enlightened moments like they’re bonus miles. You're either in, or you're out. Period.
Wisdom Nugget:
If you think you're enlightened, go spend a week with your family. If you still feel enlightened after that, congratulations—you’re delusional.
So, are you in or out?
Forget the daily scorecard. Aim for nothingness; you might hit something worthwhile.